So here is the deal. I do not have a best friend, but I have always wanted one. Now, don’t get me wrong I have had friends my whole life. I get along with others easily and gosh darn it, people like me. But every time I hear someone casually say, “my best friend yada yada yada…” My mind wanders…
BEST friend? Like THE best? And you two agree on this?
See I get how two people become an item. You start out as friends and then as Bonnie Raitt puts it, “we stare just a little too long…we laugh just a little too loud.” But how do friends become best friends? I mean, its gotta be mutual. Who makes the first move? Do you ask, “do you want to be my best friend?” How awkward if they don’t reciprocate the sentiment. As someone in search of best friend, I am baffled by the process. I have had people introduce me to their best friend and I always look for a subtle grimace from the person introduced. Nothing. “Wow. They really ARE best friends” I think, “Girlfriend didn’t even flinch.”
As fabulous as the idea of a best friend seems to me, I realize I may have something even better. Sisters. And a mom who feels like a sister. A sister is the closest I’ve come to having a best friend and probably most people feel the opposite. I can’t tell you how thankful I am for my sisterhood tribe that is my family. BUT. Even my mom, and both my sisters HAVE BEST FRIENDS!! So again I am left wondering if there is someone out there for me…
The friends I DO have are AWESOME. We laugh together, we cry together and then they mention their “best friend” in a story and dammit. Is everybody taken?! Maybe I’ll never have a best friend. Maybe I would be too much for one person to claim. After all, there is at least a period of 24 hours each month that I can’t stand to be around me. But everywhere I go, there I am. A thirty-something longing for friendship because that’s where the good stuff of life is. That is how God designed us to be our best- in relationship.
I’m learning to be a good friend. I relish the closeness I have with Mr. Right. I enjoy (mostly) these little people that are raising me and we have a deal that they are allowed to grow up ONLY if they promise to be my friend. Forever. My mom-friend is the first person I call when I have good news. I can count on my sisters to give me on honest feedback on my jean butt pocket symmetry and to laugh at my jokes-even the inappropriate ones. I know my fr-amily and the handful of friends I have will always be there for me for better or worse. When I’m at my coolest and when I’ve failed miserably. And even if all of them have a best friend- I claim them all to be my best friends. Plural. I may never share half of a heart locket with someone…but these people, my people have my whole heart.
Life, Love and Letters 